My 5 year old finally tried a new food after 8 months of the same six things
I just need to put this somewhere because my husband is asleep and I am sitting in the kitchen crying happy tears a little. For almost eight months my daughter ate the exact same rotation. Plain pasta, plain rice, the specific brand of cracker that she would accept, one kind of cheese stick, dry cereal, and apple slices with the skin taken off. That was it. If anything touched anything else on the plate, dinner was over. If I changed the cracker brand even once, full shutdown. I started to feel like I was failing her every single day, like I was doing something fundamentally wrong as a mother. Tonight she picked up a piece of steamed broccoli off my plate, sniffed it for a long time, and then ate it. Chewed it. Did not gag. Did not cry. She just made a face and said "it tastes green" and went back to her crackers. I know that sounds like nothing. I know a lot of you are in the thick of it and one broccoli floret does not solve anything. But I remember reading posts in this group at 11pm absolutely desperate for someone to tell me there was light somewhere, so I just wanted to be that for someone tonight. We are still in feeding therapy. It has been slow. Our pediatrician and the therapist kept reminding me that progress is not linear and I kept not believing them. I believe them now, a little. If you are in the six foods phase right now, I see you. It is so hard and it is so lonely and the worry is real.
Replies · 12
"It tastes green" I am not okay. That is the most five year old thing I have ever read and it is perfect. Congratulations. Genuinely. I know exactly that feeling of sitting alone in the kitchen after the kids are down just needing to tell someone. My middle one was deep in a food rut for close to a year. You are not failing her. You never were.
This made me smile so much. And "it tastes green" is genuinely a win, because she engaged with it. She described it. That's her brain processing something new and not immediately rejecting it, which is actually a really meaningful step in sensory-based picky eating. Just want to gently add for anyone reading this in the earlier stages: the slow, boring, repetitive exposure stuff that feeding therapists talk about really does have a logic to it. It's not magic and it's not fast, but the research behind it is solid. Your own care team will know what approach fits your specific kid though, so always worth asking them if you're unsure what direction to go.
This is a good point. My daughter's therapist called it "building a relationship with the food before eating it" and it sounded a bit silly to me at first but after watching it work, I get it now.
Okay I needed this post tonight more than you know. My six year old has been on her same short list since her celiac diagnosis almost two years ago and I have been so scared that the texture issues and the new food anxiety got worse after we had to cut out so many things at once. Like we basically had to rebuild her whole diet and her safe foods got even smaller during that process. Does it feel different now that your daughter tried something new? Like does she seem more open generally, or was it really just that one moment and then back to normal?
Honestly, and I want to be real with you, it was kind of just that one moment. She did not ask for more broccoli. Breakfast this morning was the same cereal it always is. So I do not want to oversell it. But our therapist said something I keep thinking about, she said each exposure is depositing something even when it looks like nothing happened. So even if your daughter tried a new safe food and then never touched it again, that is still a deposit. I found that weirdly comforting. And honestly the stress of having to rebuild her diet after a diagnosis, I cannot even imagine how hard that must have been. That is so much to go through at once for both of you.
What you're describing with the anxiety getting worse after the dietary change is something a lot of families in celiac situations mention. It makes sense when you think about how much uncertainty there was around food all of a sudden. If you haven't already, it might be worth bringing the food anxiety piece up specifically with her pediatrician or GI team, separate from just the nutrition side. Some kids benefit from having that part addressed directly.
The deposit thing. I am writing that down. Thank you.
Also just want to say, you mentioned feeling like you were failing her every day and I want to sit with that for a second because I think almost every parent in this group has felt exactly that, and it is such a cruel feeling because you are clearly not failing her. You showed up to every single meal for eight months and kept the pressure low and got her into therapy. That is the opposite of failing.
I read this three times. Thank you.
Coming back the next morning to say I told my husband about the deposit thing at breakfast and now he's using it too. So thank you for that. And congratulations again on your broccoli floret. I hope there are more weird green descriptions ahead.
Ha. I really hope so too. She described a cucumber slice last week as "wet and suspicious" so clearly she has opinions, she's just choosing crackers for now. Wishing your daughter all the small deposits.
"Wet and suspicious" is going in my group chat immediately